Go.
Have you ever noticed, that when we blog, we often take on an entirely different voice? Somewhat removed, third-person, polished perspective?
We paint pictures with words, we create beautiful illustrations, and we tell detailed, wonderful stories. We're writers; words are our craft. And they're beautiful. And that's a good thing.
But the reality is, my blogger voice often times has a very different pitch and tone from my real voice. I don't (thankfully) always talk like I write. My words are far more muddled, far less well-crafted, and far more... well, first-person human. And that's a good thing.
But sometimes the veneer has to come off here too - in our process of being "real" and "present" even in the blogger world. The smooth, shiny gloss of life-on-blog has to be replaced with the real, gritty, imperfect verbage, and non-colorful illustrations that actually make up real life. Just so that we remember that oh yes, we're human too. No matter how pretty the picture, or crafty with words the blogger, sometimes life just is as life often does. So, in the name of being present, of sanding down the shiny veneer and artistic verbage:
... It's been a hard week.
... I've felt torn between being at work, and being at home. And had a really hard time being at work.
... Work has been stressful as we navigate the merger - everyone, me included, is anxious and waiting. Which can be the worst, because it means living in the completely unknown.
... I have started the last three mornings this week being pooped on. The explosive, nasty, cannot-get-it-out kind of poopy diaper that goes EVERYwhere. Not once, not twice, but three times.
I have been Snappy. Tired. Lazy. Angry. Anxious. Grateful. Loved. Lonely. Tearful. Laugh-filled. Torn. Covered in poop, with no humorous conclusion or awkward story to tell. Heard. Unheard.
Raw.
Real.
Just me.
Present.
Stop.
Written in participation with #FiveMinuteFriday over at LisaJoBaker.com. We write for five minutes flat, all on the same prompt. No extreme editing; no worrying about perfect grammar, font, or punctuation. Unscripted. Unedited. Real. Want to join in? Full details on how to participate found here!
yes, this describes the many years of motherhood. lots of fun mixed in too, but also, lots of nasty, can't get it out poop:) the sense of humor over it all will come. I promise:)
ReplyDeleteI really appreciate your honest heart, bless you.
ReplyDeleteI so understand this post could have been my life on more than 100 days :) especially the struggle between being at work and being home. That's part of the "present" God put in my life, He made it clear that full-time work and full-time mom are both part of His plan for me. Sometimes, the humor is really in the poop. Thanks for your real post.
ReplyDeleteThanks for being real. Living in the present isn't always pretty, but you'll laugh about it eventually. Once it's in the past, it will make the present a richer, deeper experience.
ReplyDeleteStopping over from Lisa-Jo's - and just wanted to tell you that you're doing a great job, mama. I've been there - the job stuff, the diaper stuff, the rest of it. Thanks for being "you" - and for getting up each morning to do it all again.
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